Executor's Guide: First Steps When a Parent Dies

What Does an Executor Actually Do?

As executor, you're the estate's legal representative. Your core responsibilities include:

• Locating and securing assets (bank accounts, property, investments, personal belongings)
• Managing the estate through probate (filing paperwork with court)
• Paying debts and taxes (final income taxes, estate taxes if applicable)
• Distributing assets to beneficiaries according to the will
• Keeping records and communicating with heirs and creditors

How long does this take? Most estates take 6-18 months to settle. Complex estates with disputes, business interests, or tax issues can take several years.

Do you get paid? Yes, executors are entitled to reasonable compensation, typically 2-5% of the estate value depending on state law. Many family members waive this fee, but you're legally entitled to it.

First Week: Immediate Executor Responsibilities

Step 1: Confirm You're the Executor

Find the original will (not a copy). The will should name you as executor (sometimes called "personal representative"). You're not officially the executor until the court appoints you, but you can start taking preliminary steps.

Where to find the will:

• Home safe or filing cabinet
• With their estate attorney
• Safety deposit box at their bank
• State registry (some states allow will registration)

Step 2: Secure the Estate Assets Immediately

You have a legal duty to protect estate property from loss or theft:

• Change locks on their home if necessary
• Secure valuable items (jewelry, collections, electronics)
• Take photos of the home's condition and valuable items
• Continue paying mortgage, utilities, and property insurance
• Have mail forwarded to you
• Cancel credit cards to prevent fraud

Step 3: Notify Key Parties

Within the first week, notify:

• The estate attorney (if one exists)
• All beneficiaries named in the will
• Banks and financial institutions (to freeze accounts)
• Insurance companies (life, property, health)
• Employer (if your parent was still working)
• Social Security Administration (1-800-772-1213)

Step 4: Open an Estate Bank Account

Don't mix estate money with your personal funds. Open a separate checking account in the estate's name. You'll need:

• The death certificate
• Your identification
• Your EIN (Employer Identification Number) for the estate—get this free from the IRS

All estate income goes into this account. All estate expenses come from this account. Keep meticulous records.

Weeks 2-4: Filing for Probate

Understanding Probate

Probate is the court process that:

• Validates the will
• Officially appoints you as executor
• Gives you legal authority to act on behalf of the estate
• Provides oversight to protect heirs and creditors

Does this estate need to go through probate? It depends on your state and the estate size. Small estates may qualify for simplified procedures. Assets passing outside probate include:

• Assets with named beneficiaries (life insurance, retirement accounts, payable-on-death accounts)
• Assets held in living trusts
• Jointly owned property with right of survivorship

How to File for Probate

Where to file: The probate court in the county where your parent lived. Look up "[County Name] Probate Court" online.

What you'll need:

• Original will
• Death certificate (official copy)
• Petition for probate (court form)
• Notice to heirs and beneficiaries
• Filing fee ($150-$500 depending on state)

Timeline: After filing, the court typically schedules a hearing 2-6 weeks later. At the hearing, the judge will officially appoint you as executor and issue "Letters Testamentary"—the legal document proving your authority.

Months 2-6: Managing the Estate

Creating an Asset Inventory

You must identify and value all estate assets. This process takes time. Create a spreadsheet listing:

Financial Assets:

• Bank accounts (checking, savings, CDs)
• Investment accounts (brokerage, mutual funds)
• Retirement accounts (401k, IRA, pension)
• Life insurance policies
• Annuities

Real Property:

• Primary residence
• Vacation homes
• Rental properties
• Land

Personal Property:

• Vehicles
• Jewelry and valuable collections
• Furniture and household items
• Art and antiques

Business Interests:

• Ownership in companies or partnerships
• Intellectual property

Digital Assets:

• Cryptocurrency
• Online accounts and stored files
• Domain names or websites

Getting Professional Appraisals

Real estate, businesses, and valuable personal property often require professional appraisals for probate. This isn't optional—the court requires accurate valuations.

Typical costs:

• Home appraisal: $300-$600
• Business valuation: $2,000-$10,000+
• Estate sale/personal property appraisal: $200-$500

Notifying Creditors

You must provide legal notice to creditors. The process varies by state but typically involves:

• Publishing a notice in local newspapers (the court will specify requirements)
• Sending direct notice to known creditors
• Waiting through a "claims period" (usually 3-6 months)

Creditors have a limited time to file claims. After the deadline, most claims are barred.

Paying Debts and Expenses

Estate debts must be paid before any distribution to heirs. Pay in this order (priority varies slightly by state):

1. Funeral and burial expenses
2. Estate administration costs (attorney fees, appraisals, court costs)
3. Taxes (final income tax, estate tax if applicable)
4. Medical bills from final illness
5. Secured debts (mortgage, car loans)
6. Unsecured debts (credit cards, personal loans)

Filing Tax Returns

You must file several tax returns:

Final Personal Income Tax Return (Form 1040):

• Due April 15 of the year following death
• Covers income from January 1 through date of death
• File jointly with surviving spouse if married

Estate Income Tax Return (Form 1041):

• If estate generates income during administration (rental income, investment income, etc.)
• Due annually until estate is closed

Estate Tax Return (Form 706):

• Only required if estate exceeds federal exemption ($13.99 million in 2025)
• Some states have lower thresholds for state estate tax
• Due 9 months after death (can request extension)

Recommendation: Hire a CPA or tax attorney for estate tax returns. Mistakes can be costly.

Months 6-12: Distributing Assets

When Can You Distribute Assets?

Don't distribute assets until:

• The creditor claims period has ended
• All debts and taxes are paid
• You have court approval (if required in your state)
• All disputes are resolved

Most executors wait 6-9 months before distributing assets.

How to Distribute Assets

Specific bequests first: If the will says "I leave my diamond ring to Jane," distribute those items first.

Residuary estate next: Everything else (the "residuary estate") is divided according to the will's instructions, typically as percentages to named beneficiaries.

Get receipts: Have each beneficiary sign a receipt acknowledging what they received. This protects you if someone later claims they didn't receive their share.

Selling Estate Property

Often you'll need to sell assets (real estate, vehicles, personal property) to pay debts or convert assets to cash for distribution.

Real estate:

• You have authority to sell as executor
• Some states require court approval for sales
• List with realtor or sell privately
• Proceeds go into estate account

Personal property:

• Estate sale companies handle everything for 30-40% commission
• Donate items with little value (get donation receipt for estate records)
• Let heirs choose items they want before sale

Closing the Estate

After all debts are paid and assets distributed, you must formally close the estate with the court:

1. Prepare final accounting showing all assets, income, expenses, and distributions
2. File closing documents with probate court
3. Get receipts from all beneficiaries
4. Obtain court order closing the estate and releasing you from duties

Keep all estate records for at least 7 years after closing in case of IRS audit or legal challenges.

Common Executor Challenges

Dealing with Difficult Family Members

Money and grief create conflict. Common issues:

• Impatient heirs wanting their inheritance immediately
• Disputes over personal property ("Mom promised me that ring")
• Accusations of favoritism or mismanagement
• Siblings who won't help but criticize your work

How to protect yourself:

• Communicate regularly with all beneficiaries
• Keep detailed records of every decision and transaction
• Be transparent about estate value and timeline
• Don't take personal property without documenting it
• Consider hiring a neutral mediator if conflicts arise

What If You Can't Find All Assets?

It's common to discover assets months into administration. Check for:

• Unclaimed property databases (each state maintains one)
• Old employer retirement accounts
• Veterans benefits
• Insurance policies through employers or organizations
• Safe deposit boxes at multiple banks

Review several years of bank statements and tax returns to identify accounts you may have missed.

When Beneficiaries Can't Be Located

If you can't find a beneficiary, you must make reasonable efforts:

• Search public records and online databases
• Contact known relatives
• Hire a professional locator service
• Follow your state's requirements for notice publication

If still unsuccessful, the court will provide instructions on holding the inheritance.

Can You Resign as Executor?

Yes. If this role is too overwhelming, you can resign. The court will appoint a successor executor (usually the alternate named in the will, or another family member).

To resign:

• File a resignation petition with the probate court
• Provide accounting of everything you've done so far
• Turn over all estate property and records to successor

You can't resign retroactively to avoid consequences of mistakes already made, but if you realize early that you can't handle the responsibility, resigning is better than doing the job poorly.

Resources and Tools

Finding Professional Help:

• Estate attorneys: State bar association lawyer referral services
• CPAs: American Institute of CPAs (aicpa.org)
• Appraisers: American Society of Appraisers (appraisers.org)

Court Resources:

• Most probate courts have self-help centers with forms and instructions
• Court clerks can answer procedural questions (but can't give legal advice)

Helpful Books:

• "The Executor's Guide" by Mary Randolph (Nolo Press)
• "The American Bar Association Guide to Wills and Estates"

Legal Disclaimer: This guide provides general information about executor duties and is not legal advice. Estate and probate laws vary significantly by state. Consult with a qualified estate attorney for guidance specific to your situation.

Related Articles: What to Do When a Parent Dies: Essential First Week Checklist | When There's No Will: Intestate Estate Management

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